Just for fun the other day, I pretended to be Jesus in His Ascension and Second Coming. I Google Earthed my flights both from and to the Church of the Ascension, just East of the Temple Mount on the Mount of Olives. Interesting experience.

"Men of Galilee," they said, "why do you stand here looking into the sky? This same Jesus, who has been taken from you into heaven, will come back in the same way you have seen him go into heaven." Acts 1:11

The first thing you notice in the Ascension away from the Mount of Olives is just how quickly Jerusalem falls out of view and the surrounding mountains of brown and valleys most obscure come into view. Wow, everyone disappeared into nothingness pretty darn quickly. As I drew back even more you could see all of Israel and the Med and soon all of the Middle East with Africa, Europe and China coming into the scene very quickly. Jerusalem and the launch pad were long gone...lost in the browness of mountains that folded and swirled as you could see the forces that created them pushing on them. Needless to say, the whole earth finally came into view, beautiful and round. A blue ball in the blackness of space. Stars appeared and then the sense that the earth is absolutely nothing in, not even a speck if you were able to keep backing the picuture out into space. The sun is just an average star of billions in our galaxy and our galaxy is one billions swirling in space. Our Universe may be a finite thing in infinite space. It may be one grape of a cluster of Universes. It's the view Jesus would have had as he ascended and I wondered at what point I/He would have thought "this is far enough from earth, I am home for now." Like Superman, I also wondered how he could breathe much above 20,000 feet or stay warm, but I guess that's where the magic of being God comes in.

At any rate, the earth was gone, the solar system was gone, the swirl of stars in the Orion arm of our galaxy was gone as was the galaxy...One did have to wonder how Jesus would ever be able to find us again. So I pushed the return button on Google Earth. Magic! I quickly sped past galaxies and eventually a star when by that seemed familiar, soon a moon raced at me and passed and then, sure enough a blue orb...earth, I saw Africa, China, and the Middle East Again. The Americans were sleeping on the other side. Iraq to the East, Egypt to the South and then Israel....zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzoooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooom! There is Jerusalem...the Mount of Olives and TOUCHDOWN! I was back in the same way I left and right to Mt. of Olives as scheduled.

I played with a few times. Ascending out to the blackness of space and then zooming in for a Second Coming, seeing it all just as Jesus would have going both ways. I did have a few thoughts about this amazing theological trip.

1. The Middle East is brown and it's hard to find any humans from very far up.

2. If I personally had a choice, I'd want to return to near Southern Ohio or Virginia where it is simply beautiful when seen from the heights.

3. I suspect at the rate we are going, anything or anyone that attempts to land without permission in the Middle East will be shot down. I would suspect if it was Jesus, it might cause some problems in response and here we go again in the Middle East. Eye for eyelash stuff.

4. Since most of the Christians are no longer in the Middle East, how about a new return spot in beautiful Germany, France or Switzerland? Less shooting down possibilities and much more green. I would not suggest a Washington D.C. landing as there has never been room for two god's in the same location in the history of the world as far as I can tell. They usually break out into arguing and saying things to each other like, "I know you are but what am I?" etc.. Not good. Michael Rene' and Gort the Robot tried that in the 50's and it was nothing but trouble.

5. I would not suggest a Second Coming in Texas either. While it looks like the Middle East in many ways, and might feel familiar, many of the earth gods vacation there and again, it could cause a problem like some War of the Worlds thing again. Besides, Jesus might get busted by Homeland Security for an illegal return flyover, be imprisoned at Gitmo and never seen again. By the time he came up for trial, God the Father prolly would have changed his mind about the whole Second Coming thing anyway and sprung him.

6. I did wonder why this planet was so special in Google Earthing the Ascension and Second Coming. I can see if back then one thought they were all there was and the center of it all, the story would evolve that way. But we know now that in a flash , Where's Waldo?" can evolve into "Where's that Galaxy again?" So I wonder if there is salvation for life in other of the billions of galaxies. There has to be unless there are areas where Salvation is not offerend kinda like the sweat shop thing that we don't want to think about when we buy our expensive stuff in this country. What is there is a place where our crowns and robes, the ones promised when the Second Coming is for US, are made in galactic sweatshops in a parallel or distant universe or galaxy? Gosh, don't tell me. I'll feel bad about that!

7. When you Google Earth in any spot, one does see what a great place this is to live compared to , oh say, the moon or mercury. Water, wind, moderate temps, clouds, sweetgrass, rivers and trees. Amazing lifeforms in a good way which often would exlude the hairless apes that spend most of their timing tormenting other hairless apes out of their money, land, possessions and lives. I don't mean them.

So try it sometime and see if you don't get the same impression. Google Earth yourself the Ascension of Jesus from the Mt. of Olives and then return to it, "quickly" as it says in Revelation, thought God's idea of quickly is not quite what a human might have in mind. It's easy, fun and educational and makes you feel pretty darn special for a few moments. Google Earth on Dude!