Several years ago I was at the beach playing in the waves when it hit me - the waves at the beach are very much like stress. They are powerful and just keep coming and coming.

It also occurred to me that how we handle the waves are a great metaphor for the options we have for managing and mastering stress. When we are in the waves, we can let them knock us down, we can survive them, or we can ride them and make them work for us.

Key Response Option 1 - Let stress knock you down

I call letting stress knock you down taking the dead roach approach. You know, flat on your back, legs wiggling in the air. It's a good metaphor for doing nothing.

When we take the dead roach approach we think and say things like "Why does this always happen to me?" - "This is so unfair" - "I'll never be able to handle this" and other equally empowering things.

Key Response Option 2 - Surviving stress

I call this one get by, get though, get it over with.

At this point we wonder things like how can I get through this with the least amount of effort and damage.

While survival is clearly a better option than getting knocked down, it does leave something to be desired, don't you think?

How much would you enjoy waking up tomorrow morning and thinking,

"Alright, I get to go survive today!"

Key Response Option 3 - Making stress work for you

One of the neatest things we can do with a wave is to ride it and make it work for us.

A great question to ask at this point is

"In how many ways can I make this work for me?"